does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
