get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize