He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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