you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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