I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
is wine microwaveable?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
