Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
