i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize