wat bout pragnant strippers??
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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