is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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