I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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