Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
