Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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