Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
