My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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