Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Randomize
