If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
