these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Randomize
