Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
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