Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I love you.
Bad choice
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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