What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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