He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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