They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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