Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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