We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Randomize
