I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
