Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
so explain again why im purple
no
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
