I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Randomize