I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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