dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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