So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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