these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
