a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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