why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Randomize