I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
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