I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
