my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Randomize
