you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I didn't notice because vodka
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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