Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
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