how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize