so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
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