did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
