Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
