I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize