he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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