A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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