I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Randomize