is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
