it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
