Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
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