don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
