VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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